Back to work tomorrow :(

It is so hard to believe that we have been home for more than a week.   I swear I can see Elsie growing physically.  Definitely emotionally.  She smiles and is more confident every day.....sometimes a little too confident.  She is doing so much better with daddy too.  She still prefers me, but he can do more with her, which is good because I have to go back to work tomorrow.  I don't know which one of us it will be harder on, me or Elsie?  When we started this process I was a spry 48 year old.  If someone had told me that I would be 52 before we finished, I would have never said yes.  In the beginning, I said yes somewhat grudgingly.  Brad said he thought that God was calling him to China adoption and who am I to question God?  I thought, come on, I already started over with Brad's kids, do I really need to do it again.  Now I can't imagine my life without her.  I wondered if I could love her like my "own" kids.  Now I lay and watch her sleep and wonder how I could have ever doubted.  She is so amazing!  And smart, yeah I know every mom says that, but she picks up on things so quickly.  She was barely walking when we first met her and now we have to run to keep up with her.  We thought she would be so lost not understanding what people said to her and yet she learned her American name before we left China.  She loves the computer.  Yesterday she picked up Brad's camera and held it just the right way to take a picture and pushed the correct button.  We went to the store on Friday and she even picked out the clothes she liked. She is more comfortable with her family, and it is a big family, every day.  She is the perfect fit.